Tag Archives: tears

Pool of tears.

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She sat by the shore. The cold water rhythmically wet her toes now and again. Some more and then no more. She inched closer to the water. She sadly stared out at the man in the water, helplessly flailing his arms around. She wished she could help him. But she’d just come out of the water for him. She’d tried dragging him to the banks. She’d tried calling out for help. She’d tried hauling him over herself. But after a while, there’s nothing she could do. She saved herself from drowning. That is all she could do. He didn’t want to be saved. Yet he wanted to live.

“Let me please help you,” she cried out. She pushed her drenched hair out of her eyes. Sand was stuck on her wet palms and legs. He didn’t reply. He struggled without making a sound. He didn’t cry out for help. Her dress was soaked. It clenched to her contours. She was breathing heavily. She was struggling to breathe as he was struggling to die. She dug her fingers in the sand and dried leaves around. She sobbed uncontrollably. Her lungs were searing with pain.

She looked up after a while. There was no one in sight. The water was rippling in the middle. The waves were becoming smaller. They would soon die. Just as he had. She stared at the water. Her tears were drying up. After a while, she got up, turned around and left.

She couldn’t kill herself over him. If she did that, his death would be a waste. After all, he had just killed himself over his love. She couldn’t repeat his mistakes.

Graciously Yours!

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His Smile, For Her.

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HIS SMILE, FOR HER.

The day she saw him,
She knew that smile was for her,
The warmth that touched their hearts,
Brought them closer together.

Those eyes that glittered her way,
Could see her inside out,
His hand that touched hers,
Touched the soul within.

Hands clasped, rushing
Through the surreality,
Like two little kids,
Exploring the world together.

In the gleam of their happiness,
They didn’t see,
The brazen darkness,
Coming their way.

Before she could place herself,
In the safety of his arms,
They drifted apart in silence,
Lost and never to be found.

She didn’t know where to look,
She didn’t know what to do,
She thought he would wait,
Like she had all along.

Times later, she saw the smile again,
Not for her this time around,
She felt empty and blown away,
When those eyes treated her like a stranger.

The winds rose inside her,
Causing her fluttering heart,
To bang hard against her ribs,
Throbbing with pain.

She looked away from those eyes,
Not ready to bear their ignorance,
She told her heart to calm down,
“At least he was smiling, even if not for me.”

Graciously Yours!

At God’s Door.

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AT GOD’S DOOR.

The Sun scorches my body,
I shield my eyes with my hand,
Flicking away the black ants,
Which crawl over me uninvited.

The tattered cloth barely covers my nakedness,
I writhe and lie in pain,
The Gods I have resigned to,
Lying in front of His sacred precinct.

A shadow falls over me,
There’s a respite for a while,
I open my eyes to see a towering figure,
Back towards me in black,

Maybe my time has come along,
Was that the God of Death I see?
Was I to be finally relieved,
Of the life of pain and suffering?

I hear the clanging of coins,
Was that a Messiah instead giving me money?
I crane my neck to look beside me,
But there’s no sign of the silver metal.

The striking pain in my neck is back,
Where I hurt myself from that wretched, jagged piece of rock,
I put my head on the ground again,
That figure in black still present.

Alas! The Sun is back on me,
That was a mere mortal,
Pursuing God for problems of his own,
While my life continues to take the life out of me.

Almost every day, I see  a poor, old man lying right in front of a religious place (which I refuse to mention because of it’s complete irrelevance) and many people like me pass him by with our own problems raging in our heads. I’m not proud of it. At all.

Graciously Yours!

P.S. : This isn’t a post about religion. Or faith. It is about humanity. Or our lack of it.

 

Under the tree.

Every single day, I was sitting in the corner under the tree – protected from the harshness of the Sun, the stares of Man and thorny ground below. I was waiting for the days to end, nights to fall, life to go on. One of those days you came along like a breath of fresh air bringing the whiffs of flowers and scents of freshly baked cookies. I was wary. You said you only wanted to talk to me. You were sad. You wanted company. I was sadder. I know what you felt. You told me about tales of long lost men and those voyages of the seas, the lands in faraway places and the Heavens where Gods can be. You aroused in me the desire to live, the want to know, the need to talk. I hesitated, stuttered, stammered, paused and then there was no stopping me. I was bubbling with newer energy each day I saw you. I waited for the nights to end and days to come now. One day you didn’t come. I waited all day long. There were no flowers to smell around me. The second day you didn’t come, I ventured from under my tree. I couldn’t see you all day. The third day you didn’t come again. My heart broke when I saw you laughing down the street, playing with people whom I had heard about. You forgot about me when I couldn’t stop thinking about you.

I went back to my corner under the tree – protected from the harshness of the Sun, the stares of Man and thorny ground below but with a heart split open to bleed. Again.

Graciously Yours!